CYKO 1963
08-20-2015, 08:51 PM
Why The Chicken Crossed The Road
TEACHER: To get to the other side.
PLATO: For the greater good.
ARISTOTLE: It is in the nature of
chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX: It was a historical
inevitability.
ANDERSEN CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the
road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with
significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the
newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with
the client, helped the chicken by rethinking it's physical distribution strategy
and implementation process. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen
helped the chicken use it's skills, methodologies
, knowledge capital and
experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support
of it's overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen
Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens
along with Andersen consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry
to engage in a two day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal
knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with
each other in order to achieve theimplicit goals of delivering and successfully
architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the
continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like
setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically
based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear and unified market
message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision and core values. This was
conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution paradigm.
TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the
establishment would let it take.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act
of rebellion and we werequite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on
it.
RONALD REAGAN: I forget.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no
chicken has gone before.
LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the
black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep
him down.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will
be free to cross roads without having their motives called into
question.
MOSES (Monty Python style): And God came down from the Heavens, and
he said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed
the road, ...and there was much rejoicing.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the
road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road for you
to believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I
repeat, the chicken DID NOT cross the road.
MACHIAVELLI: The point is that
the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road
justifies whatever motive there was.
JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross
the road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was the
chicken doing wandering around all over the place anyway?"
FREUD: The fact
that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your
underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES: I have just released the new
Chicken Office 2010 (with integrated Internet Seed Explorer), which will not
only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook.
OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross
the road?" Rather, it is, "Who is crossing the road at the same time, whom we
overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"
DARWIN: Chickens,
over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they
are genetically disposed to cross roads.
EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken
crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame
of reference.
BUDDHA: Asking the question denies your own chicken
nature.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road...it
transcended it.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain
TEACHER: To get to the other side.
PLATO: For the greater good.
ARISTOTLE: It is in the nature of
chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX: It was a historical
inevitability.
ANDERSEN CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the
road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with
significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the
newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with
the client, helped the chicken by rethinking it's physical distribution strategy
and implementation process. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen
helped the chicken use it's skills, methodologies
, knowledge capital and
experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support
of it's overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen
Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens
along with Andersen consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry
to engage in a two day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal
knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with
each other in order to achieve theimplicit goals of delivering and successfully
architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the
continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like
setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically
based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear and unified market
message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision and core values. This was
conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution paradigm.
TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the
establishment would let it take.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act
of rebellion and we werequite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on
it.
RONALD REAGAN: I forget.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no
chicken has gone before.
LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the
black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep
him down.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will
be free to cross roads without having their motives called into
question.
MOSES (Monty Python style): And God came down from the Heavens, and
he said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed
the road, ...and there was much rejoicing.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the
road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road for you
to believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I
repeat, the chicken DID NOT cross the road.
MACHIAVELLI: The point is that
the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road
justifies whatever motive there was.
JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross
the road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was the
chicken doing wandering around all over the place anyway?"
FREUD: The fact
that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your
underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES: I have just released the new
Chicken Office 2010 (with integrated Internet Seed Explorer), which will not
only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook.
OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross
the road?" Rather, it is, "Who is crossing the road at the same time, whom we
overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"
DARWIN: Chickens,
over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they
are genetically disposed to cross roads.
EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken
crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame
of reference.
BUDDHA: Asking the question denies your own chicken
nature.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road...it
transcended it.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain