ironworks
03-09-2012, 05:30 PM
By MarcMiddleton3/9/2012
We start the show off with a video package recapping the recent history of Garett Bischoff's career, his father and Ric Flair's warnings to stay out of the business, and Hulk Hogan telling him that he's got a target on his back because of his father. We then go out to the parking lot where Garett arrives at the arena and tells the Mystery Cameraman that he hasn't changed his mind, and he's going to continue his career regardless of what his dad thinks.
We go to the Impact Zone as Eric Bischoff, Flair, and Gunner open the show so Eric can say that he has to settle more family business tonight. Garett has pushed so hard that he asked Sting to let Gunner pick a partner to face Garett and a partner of his choosing for tonight on Impact. Bischoff says he and Flair have worked together for 20 years through a lot of ups and downs, but he was looking out for Garett like he would look out for his own son by telling him not to come back and face the serious, and possibly permanent, consequences. Flair did that because he's a true professional, and he has Eric's gratitude, but Garett is going to have a real tough time finding a partner because nobody in their right mind would want to be his partner. He ponders on who might be Gunner's partner tonight, but Kurt Angle's music hits and he comes out with his big creepy smile one. He said he'll be happy to team with Gunner against Eric's disrespectful son because he hates Garett for not respecting his father. When Angle grew up, he listened to his dad and he became an Olympic gold medalist. Eric has great advice but Garett just doesn't listen to him, and everybody hates all the Bischoffs, but he's going to team with Gunner anyway and make Garett tap, tap, and tap again.
Meanwhile, Garett is backstage looking upset at this turn of events and we're left to wonder who would possibly want to team with him. In the meantime, Sting is in the bathroom smearing what I presume to be facepaint all over himself while coming unhinged and cutting a promo on Bobby Roode in the mirror telling him he has ten days to go. Eric Young wanders in to hang out with Sting and ask him for his blessing to propose to ODB tonight in the ring. Sting says he's got it and says that she wants it all: diamonds, gold, and a title shot. He makes a match with ODB challenging for the Knockouts Tag Team Title tonight, and Eric Young is going to be his partner. He smears paint on Eric's face and tells him that he's a WARR-YAH and to go out there and be a WARR-YAH before going back to cutting his promo on Roode in the mirror. WHAT a bizarre open to the show!
Knockouts Tag Team Title Match: Gail Kim & Madison Rayne vs ODB & Eric Young
Well, I guess it was about time for our quarterly Knockouts Tag Team Title defense anyway. ODB and Gail have a slugfest and Gail tries to go up top, but ODB powers her off the top and hits a powerslam before shaking her boobs at Madison. Madison comes in to dish out some punishment, but ODB sits on the top turnbuckle and repeatedly rams Madison's face into her crotch before hitting a Thesz Press for 2. Gail hits a hanging neckbreaker over the top rope when the ref had his back turned and Madison dumps her out to the floor where Gail puts the boots to her. Gail sends ODB back in and they hit a series of double teams, finishing with a bulldog from Madison for 2. ODB spears Madison out of nowhere and both sides make hot tags, and Eric keeps evading Gail's attack to tie up with the referee instead. He gets both Madison and Gail in a double fireman's carry into an airplane spin. He dumps them both and staggers around before covering Gail for 2. ODB mows them both down with a double clothesline, but goes to the outside and Madison rams her into the ring steps. Gail unloads on Eric in the ring, and he responds by pulling his pants down and grabbing her. Madison comes in from behind with one of the title belts and hits Eric from behind, and he falls on top of Gail with a sex cover and Gail, unable to wriggle out from under his girth, is easy prey for a three count.
Winners and NEW Knockouts Tag Team Champions: Eric Young & ODB
ODB celebrates their championship win, but Eric stops and holds her hand, drops to one knee, and pulls an engagement ring out of...well, somewhere I guess. I didn't see and don't care to rewind and find out. ODB looks stunned, but we'll have to wait until after the commercial to find out what her answer is! Okay, we're back and EY says that they have a lot of momentum on their side: they're champions, they just got the studio apartment they had their eyes on, and it's the right time to do what he's going to do. He asks her if she'll marry him and holds out the ring to him, she takes it and considers for a moment, then drops to one knee and asks if he'll marry her. He goes "YES! YES! YES!" and puts the ring on himself, then bails out of the ring to run around ringside and high five the fans before coming back into the ring and jumping into her arms before they collapse to the mat and roll around making out with each other.
We go out to the ring where...some fat guy shows up and passes through security for some business he's here on. We then go backstage to Bully Ray, who says that memory loss is a sign of a concussion, but he'll remind James Storm that he's the guy who gave him a concussion. He's not making it to Lockdown, because he's going to take him out. Then we go somewhere ELSE in the back, and Aries (who is impressed that Sting has Twitter AND email now) looks at his smartphone and discovers that he's defending the X Division Title against Zema Ion later tonight. He says it's bad business, but he'll beat Ion and then skip the PPV entirely.
We start the show off with a video package recapping the recent history of Garett Bischoff's career, his father and Ric Flair's warnings to stay out of the business, and Hulk Hogan telling him that he's got a target on his back because of his father. We then go out to the parking lot where Garett arrives at the arena and tells the Mystery Cameraman that he hasn't changed his mind, and he's going to continue his career regardless of what his dad thinks.
We go to the Impact Zone as Eric Bischoff, Flair, and Gunner open the show so Eric can say that he has to settle more family business tonight. Garett has pushed so hard that he asked Sting to let Gunner pick a partner to face Garett and a partner of his choosing for tonight on Impact. Bischoff says he and Flair have worked together for 20 years through a lot of ups and downs, but he was looking out for Garett like he would look out for his own son by telling him not to come back and face the serious, and possibly permanent, consequences. Flair did that because he's a true professional, and he has Eric's gratitude, but Garett is going to have a real tough time finding a partner because nobody in their right mind would want to be his partner. He ponders on who might be Gunner's partner tonight, but Kurt Angle's music hits and he comes out with his big creepy smile one. He said he'll be happy to team with Gunner against Eric's disrespectful son because he hates Garett for not respecting his father. When Angle grew up, he listened to his dad and he became an Olympic gold medalist. Eric has great advice but Garett just doesn't listen to him, and everybody hates all the Bischoffs, but he's going to team with Gunner anyway and make Garett tap, tap, and tap again.
Meanwhile, Garett is backstage looking upset at this turn of events and we're left to wonder who would possibly want to team with him. In the meantime, Sting is in the bathroom smearing what I presume to be facepaint all over himself while coming unhinged and cutting a promo on Bobby Roode in the mirror telling him he has ten days to go. Eric Young wanders in to hang out with Sting and ask him for his blessing to propose to ODB tonight in the ring. Sting says he's got it and says that she wants it all: diamonds, gold, and a title shot. He makes a match with ODB challenging for the Knockouts Tag Team Title tonight, and Eric Young is going to be his partner. He smears paint on Eric's face and tells him that he's a WARR-YAH and to go out there and be a WARR-YAH before going back to cutting his promo on Roode in the mirror. WHAT a bizarre open to the show!
Knockouts Tag Team Title Match: Gail Kim & Madison Rayne vs ODB & Eric Young
Well, I guess it was about time for our quarterly Knockouts Tag Team Title defense anyway. ODB and Gail have a slugfest and Gail tries to go up top, but ODB powers her off the top and hits a powerslam before shaking her boobs at Madison. Madison comes in to dish out some punishment, but ODB sits on the top turnbuckle and repeatedly rams Madison's face into her crotch before hitting a Thesz Press for 2. Gail hits a hanging neckbreaker over the top rope when the ref had his back turned and Madison dumps her out to the floor where Gail puts the boots to her. Gail sends ODB back in and they hit a series of double teams, finishing with a bulldog from Madison for 2. ODB spears Madison out of nowhere and both sides make hot tags, and Eric keeps evading Gail's attack to tie up with the referee instead. He gets both Madison and Gail in a double fireman's carry into an airplane spin. He dumps them both and staggers around before covering Gail for 2. ODB mows them both down with a double clothesline, but goes to the outside and Madison rams her into the ring steps. Gail unloads on Eric in the ring, and he responds by pulling his pants down and grabbing her. Madison comes in from behind with one of the title belts and hits Eric from behind, and he falls on top of Gail with a sex cover and Gail, unable to wriggle out from under his girth, is easy prey for a three count.
Winners and NEW Knockouts Tag Team Champions: Eric Young & ODB
ODB celebrates their championship win, but Eric stops and holds her hand, drops to one knee, and pulls an engagement ring out of...well, somewhere I guess. I didn't see and don't care to rewind and find out. ODB looks stunned, but we'll have to wait until after the commercial to find out what her answer is! Okay, we're back and EY says that they have a lot of momentum on their side: they're champions, they just got the studio apartment they had their eyes on, and it's the right time to do what he's going to do. He asks her if she'll marry him and holds out the ring to him, she takes it and considers for a moment, then drops to one knee and asks if he'll marry her. He goes "YES! YES! YES!" and puts the ring on himself, then bails out of the ring to run around ringside and high five the fans before coming back into the ring and jumping into her arms before they collapse to the mat and roll around making out with each other.
We go out to the ring where...some fat guy shows up and passes through security for some business he's here on. We then go backstage to Bully Ray, who says that memory loss is a sign of a concussion, but he'll remind James Storm that he's the guy who gave him a concussion. He's not making it to Lockdown, because he's going to take him out. Then we go somewhere ELSE in the back, and Aries (who is impressed that Sting has Twitter AND email now) looks at his smartphone and discovers that he's defending the X Division Title against Zema Ion later tonight. He says it's bad business, but he'll beat Ion and then skip the PPV entirely.