Donaldson has seen dark side of domestic violence: DiManno

Jays third baseman says players, baseball working on awareness, education

By: Rosie DiManno Columnist, Published on Mon Mar 21 2016

DUNEDIN, FLA.—Baseball is endless childhood. Grown men who never quite leave their boy selves behind.

But that implies childhood as a place of gentle delights, of innocence, of sentimentally burnished memories.

For Josh Donaldson, it wasn’t like that.

His early years were drenched in violence that no little one should ever have to witness.

“I’m not going to get too colourful with it. But it wasn’t pretty. The best way I can describe it is I can still remember things from when I was from three to five years old that are very vivid in my mind to this day. And it’s not something I would want anybody else to go through.

“It not only affects the two people that are involved but it affects children. It definitely has had an effect on me throughout my life.”

Those two people: Mom and Dad.

Donaldson was the only youngster in the household.

Late one night, Levon Donaldson — at that point separated from Lisa — broke into the home and, in a fit of rage, viciously attacked his wife. It was not the first time he’d raised his fists to her.

“There was no way I could help. It’s a tough situation for everybody to be a part of.”

Levon Donaldson would serve 15 years in prison on a slew of charges — sexual battery, false imprisonment, aggravated assault, drug offences; crimes committed against his spouse and others. His young son made semi-annual visits to the Florida penitentiary to see his dad.

The older Donaldson’s waywardness and conflict with the law had been chronic. A brother had preceded him to jail. As Josh Donaldson once recalled to a San Francisco Chronicle journalist: “At one point, the cops were looking for him and he asked me: ‘Who do you want to go with, me or your mom? I was four years old. I obviously picked my mom.”

Their relationship — mother and son — was extremely close, bound to each other by love and mutual dependence. Lisa French, a struggling divorcee, worked day and night at the family bar, leaning on her own brother to provide the boy with a sturdy male influence. She put Josh in sports — at a mere 18 months, he’d already appeared on local TV, hitting drives with a picture perfect golf swing (his dad had taught him) — for the stability that organized activities offered.

“The one positive that came out of this situation is my mom and I became inseparable, really. We both kind of lived for one another.”

Donaldson doesn’t dwell on the upheaval. He’s speaking about it on this day because a reporter has asked for his views on the Major League Baseball domestic violence policy instituted last summer. With the players’ union, baseball reached a landmark joint agreement on domestic violence, sexual assault and child abuse. The commissioner’s office pledged to investigate all allegations, independent of criminal probes, with the individual involved, whether player or a staff member, placed on paid administrative leave while the review is conducted. Discipline can be imposed even if there’s no criminal conviction.

Yankee pitcher Aroldis Chapman this month became the first MLB player held to that policy. He agreed to a 30-game suspension that will begin on Opening Day. Chapman, one of the game’s premier relievers, is alleged to have placed his hands around his girlfriend’s neck during an argument last October and of having fired a gun eight times. In a statement issued after the penalty was announced, Chapman continues to maintain he didn’t “in any way” harm his girlfriend. “However, I should have exercised better judgment with respect to my actions, and for that I am sorry.”

He chose not to appeal the suspension. That avoids putting the union, which assisted the league in developing its policy, in the awkward position of having to defend one of its players accused of domestic assault. (Police declined to press charges.)

“It’s one of those things that we’re still feeling out,” says Donaldson. “But I know that the players want to get this right, MLB wants to get it right. Personally, to have grown up in that lifestyle myself, it makes me very sensitive to the matter. The fact is, it happens too often in society. That’s the biggest issue.’’

He motions towards the ballpark where his team has just played. “These are grown men on the field here. Domestic violence is a numbers game, right? There’s going to be one or two people, just by pure numbers, who are involved in that kind of thing. It’s everywhere, in every profession. The more that we can get ahead of this, the more educated people will be and hopefully that makes everyone think.

“I feel that Major League Baseball and the union are doing a great job of making people aware — hey, if this happens you’re going to get a chance to be proven innocent or guilty, and if you’re guilty then ultimately you’re going to end up losing money and probably losing credibility for a lot of fans. It’s a very serious issue, not just in baseball but in society.”

Chapman will forfeit about $1.86 million from his 2016 salary.

Donaldson, the American League MVP, understands that he has a voice which will be heard in baseball. Earlier this year, he tweeted out a comment after former Jays teammate Jose Reyes was charged with domestic assault. “I grew up in DV so I am sensitive to this very much so. MLB will get it right I have faith.”

That post was interpreted in various ways. Donaldson is adamant he was not calling out Reyes.

“I was saying, don’t judge right away. Nowadays, we’re in a society where you’re guilty before anything happens, because of he said, she said. How many times have we seen where things don’t actually play out the way we heard, especially because of social media? Be aware of the fact that you need to allow for all the truth to come out.’’

Reyes, the ever-smiling all-star shortstop, is headed for trial next month on abuse charges arising from an incident that allegedly occurred while he was on holiday in Hawaii with his family. He was booked Oct. 31, charged in January with “abuse of a family and/or a household member” after his wife was treated by medics at a Maui hotel and later transported to hospital. A police release stated that Katherine Ramirez had suffered injuries to her face, neck and leg.

Reyes, now with the Colorado Rockies, was placed on paid leave in February. He is not at spring training and, according to most recent news reports, intends to plead not guilty.

His troubles came as a shock in the baseball world where Reyes, with his endlessly cheerful disposition, was regarded with immense affection by everybody.

“I would never have thought about Jose as that kind of a person,” says Donaldson. “And I still won’t, not until I know that there’s actual evidence or there’s an official ruling.’’

But harsh truths are often hidden behind smiling faces. Donaldson knows that too.

He’s asked if his own history has made him a more empathetic person. “I don’t know if it’s made me a kinder person, by any means. I think I have personal experience so I would be sympathetic to those who are going through it and try to be a voice of reason. I feel like I have a pretty good education and self-awareness.”

Donaldson emphasizes that he was never a target of his father’s wrath. There are many ways to hurt, though. And he’s forgiven his dad.

“I’ve forgiven him but I don’t think you ever forget. The fact of the matter is you can’t go back and change what you did yesterday. You hope that people learn from it. You hope it makes them a better human being.”