So after a brief chat i went to go pick her up. I wasn't expecting much, probably 300 lbs with bad skin, but hey, I was so desperate it was this or join an incel chatroom.


I walked up to the door and lo and behold, 5'2", baby blue eyes, strawberry blonde hair, all the right curves in all the right places. I couldn't believe my luck.


I asked her what she did for a living. She said she taught sunday school. Now I never had me a Christian girl, but I'm open minded so I took her to dinner.


On the way, I lit a joint and asked her if she puffs.


"Oh heaven's no, what would I tell my Sunday school children."


I said okay, weed's 50/50 some people do some people don't. And I took her to the best restaurant I knew. I ordered the steak, she ordered the lobster. I asked for the second most expensive bottle of wine on the menu. When the waitress came to pour, She said she didn't drink.


I said "you don't drink?!?"


"Oh heaven's no, what would I tell my Sunday school children."


Excellent food, sparkling conversation but i'm bummed out, I don't know what to do with a girl like this.


So I'm driving her home and pass a cheap motel, I figure, what have I got to lose. So i ask:

"wanna get a room and knock boots?"


She says: I thought you'd never ask!


I say: Really? What are you gonna tell your Sunday school children?


She says: The same thing I tell them every week. You don't have to drink and do drugs to have a good time!